Mother's Day

I'm glad yesterday is over. Mother's Day sucks for a lot of people. For people who have lost their mother or child, this day can be a reminder of grief. For people who have a bad relationship with their mother, this day can be a reminder of that discontentment. And for people who are battling infertility, this day is a reminder of that longing. A neon flashing sign that your life is incomplete. In your heart you are already a mother, but your reality doesn't reflect that. And there is zero you can do about it.

It's not that I don't like Mother's Day. It's not that I'm bitter or envious of those who can joyfully celebrate it. It's just a painful reminder. A reminder that my life isn't what I wanted. A reminder of the grief I battle for someone I've never even met. A reminder that if it ever really does happen, we will be the old parents. The ones that get mistaken for grandparents at soccer games. A reminder that we are so far behind, the window to catch up is just about closed.

I don't want to take away from the spirit of Mother's Day. I think it is great there is a day set aside to appreciate mothers. I'm thankful for a day to appreciate my amazing mom. And I'm thankful I have a husband who recognizes what's in my heart, even though my arms may be empty. I have a lot of to be thankful for. But, right now, I'm especially thankful yesterday is over.